t'ief t'ing 3

the gremlin just wash her foot and jump in. i am to answer questions about her.
protocol "comment that you want in, and i will do each of the following:
1. respond with something random about you.
2. tell you which song or movie you remind me of.
3. pick a flavour of jello to wrestle you in.
4. say something that only makes sense to you+me (if possible; if not, something that only makes sense to me).
5. tell you my first memory of you.
6. tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. ask you something i've always wondered about you.
8. tell you my favourite thing about you.
9. tell you my least favourite thing about you."

1. you the only person who ever tell me keep the engine running while you dump somebody, and reach back to the car before the song even change.
2. funny enough, same song others said reminded them of me- maneater, hall+oates.
3. no jello- lettuce rematch.
4. nobody taking your buff seriously when you dripping wet+naked...
5. i giving 2 because the 1st is about you indirectly- 1st realising you weren't the puppy i requested and asking if we could trade you, then you bawling down the place and me trying to lift you and nearly breaking my damn back with your heavy ass (or heavy head, back then)!
6. gazelle/cheetah- something sexy and too fast to catch. more a cheetah; gazelles too skittish.
7. how you remember all your shoe options when planning an outfit? you have a secret catalogue with pictures of them to flip through?
8. your big heart barely protected by a thin veneer of bitch.
9. said soft heart makes me worry for you. that worse than every fight we ever have.

walk good.
ps: anybody else wanting in, please comment on whatever the most recent post is, so i'll see it, just reference the questions or t'ief t'ing.

100books (bbc 50, fb 56)

what i went to t'ief from keif (bbc 61; fb 62) yesterday that led to the appointment in samarra:
"apparently the bbc reckons most people will have only read 6 of the 100 books here. the top list is the original bbc list, the list below is the one circulating on facebook.
1. look at the list and put an [x] after those you have read.
2. add a [+] to the ones you love.
3. star [*] those you plan on reading.
4. tally your total at the bottom."
maybe now i'll do some damage to my reading list, especially since i already own most of my [*]s. but even knowing my reading quantity's above average and adjusting downward for that, i'm still shocked that the bbc's expectations are so low, and hope to find out they severely underestimated the truth. 6 is just sad...

1. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien [x]+
2. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen [x]
3. His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman [*]
4. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams [x]+
5. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
6. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee [x]+
7. Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne [x]+
8. Nineteen Eighty-Four, George Orwell [x]+
9. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, CS Lewis [x]+
10. Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë [x]
11. Catch-22, Joseph Heller [x]
12. Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë [x]
13. Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
14. Rebecca, Daphne du Maurier
15. The Catcher in the Rye, JD Salinger [x]
16. The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame [x]
17. Great Expectations, Charles Dickens [x]+
18. Little Women, Louisa May Alcott [x]
19. Captain Corelli’s Mandolin, Louis de Bernieres
20. War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy [x]
21. Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell [x]
22. Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone, JK Rowling
23. Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling
24. Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling
25. The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien [x]+
26. Tess Of The D’Urbervilles, Thomas Hardy [x] and would like to add a [-] for hating it!
27. Middlemarch, George Eliot
28. A Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving [x]
29. The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck [x]
30. Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll [x]+
31. The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
32. One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel García Márquez [*]
33. The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett [x]
34. David Copperfield, Charles Dickens [*]
35. Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl [x]+
36. Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson [x]
37. A Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
38. Persuasion, Jane Austen
39. Dune, Frank Herbert [x]+
40. Emma, Jane Austen [x]
41. Anne Of Green Gables, LM Montgomery [x]
42. Watership Down, Richard Adams
43. The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald [x]+
44. The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas [*]
45. Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh [*]
46. Animal Farm, George Orwell [x]+
47. A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens [x]
48. Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy [*]
49. Goodnight Mister Tom, Michelle Magorian
50. The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher [x] not that i know why anybody cares...
51. The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett [x]
52. Of Mice And Men, John Steinbeck [x]
53. The Stand, Stephen King [x]
54. Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
55. A Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth [x]
56. The BFG, Roald Dahl [x]+
57. Swallows And Amazons, Arthur Ransome
58. Black Beauty, Anna Sewell [x]
59. Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer [*]
60. Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky [*]
61. Noughts And Crosses, Malorie Blackman
62. Memoirs Of A Geisha, Arthur Golden [*]
63. A Tale Of Two Cities, Charles Dickens [x]
64. The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough [x]
65. Mort, Terry Pratchett
66. The Magic Faraway Tree, Enid Blyton [x]+
67. The Magus, John Fowles
68. Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman [*]
69. Guards! Guards!, Terry Pratchett
70. Lord Of The Flies, William Golding [x]+
71. Perfume, Patrick Süskind [x]+
72. The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, Robert Tressell
73. Night Watch, Terry Pratchett
74. Matilda, Roald Dahl [x]+
75. Bridget Jones’s Diary, Helen Fielding
76. The Secret History, Donna Tartt
77. The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
78. Ulysses, James Joyce [*]
79. Bleak House, Charles Dickens [*]
80. Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
81. The Twits, Roald Dahl [x]+
82. I Capture The Castle, Dodie Smith
83. Holes, Louis Sachar
84. Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
85. The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy [*]
86. Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
87. Brave New World, Aldous Huxley [x]+
88. Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
89. Magician, Raymond E Feist
90. On The Road, Jack Kerouac [x]
91. The Godfather, Mario Puzo [x]
92. The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
93. The Colour Of Magic, Terry Pratchett
94. The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho [x]
95. Katherine, Anya Seton
96. Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer [x]
97. Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel García Márquez [x]+
98. Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
99. The Princess Diaries, Meg Cabot
100. Midnight’s Children, Salman Rushdie [*]

1. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen [x]
2. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien [x]+
3. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte [x]
4. Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee [x]+
6. The Bible- [x]
7. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte [x]
8. Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell [x]+
9. His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman [*]
10. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens[x]+
11. Little Women - Louisa M Alcott [x]
12. Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy [x]-
13. Catch 22 - Joseph Heller [x]
14. Complete Works of Shakespeare [x]+
15. Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16. The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien [x]+
17. Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk
18. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger [x]
19. The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger [*]
20. Middlemarch - George Eliot
21. Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell [x]
22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald [x]+
23. Bleak House - Charles Dickens[*]
24. War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy [x]
25. The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy [x]+
26. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh [*]
27. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky [*]
28. Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck [x]
29. Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll [x]+
30. The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame [x]
31. Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32. David Copperfield - Charles Dickens [*]
33. Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis [x]+
34. Emma - Jane Austen [x]
35. Persuasion - Jane Austen
36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis [x]+
37. The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini [x]
38. Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden [*]
40. Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne [x]+
41. Animal Farm - George Orwell [x] +
42. The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown [x]
43. One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez [*]
44. A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving [x]
45. The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46. Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery [x]
47. Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy [*]
48. The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49. Lord of the Flies - William Golding [x]+
50. Atonement - Ian McEwan
51. Life of Pi - Yann Martel [x]+
52. Dune - Frank Herbert [x] +
53. Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54. Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen [x]
55. A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth [x]
56. The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57. A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens [x]
58. Brave New World - Aldous Huxley [x]+
59. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon [x]
60. Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez [x]+
61. Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck [x]
62. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov [x]+
63. The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold [*]
65. Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas [*]
66. On The Road - Jack Kerouac [x]
67. Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy [x]
68. Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69. Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie [*]
70. Moby Dick - Herman Melville [x]
71. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens [x]
72. Dracula - Bram Stoker [x]
73. The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett [x]
74. Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson [*]
75. Ulysses - James Joyce [*]
76. The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath [*]
77. Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78. Germinal - Emile Zola
79. Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray [*]
80. Possession - AS Byatt
81. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens [x]
82. Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83. The Color Purple - Alice Walker [x]
84. The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro [*]
85. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert [*]
86. A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87. Charlotte’s Web - EB White [x]+
88. The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle [x]
90. The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton [x]+
91. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad [*]
92. The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery [x]
93. The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94. Watership Down - Richard Adams
95. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole [*]
96. A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas [x]
98. Hamlet - William Shakespeare [x]+
99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl [x]+
100. Les Miserables - Victor Hugo [*]

walk good.

appointment in samarra

went to keif's for something specific i plan to t'ief, but got there and saw his post about his favourite piece of fiction. it also happens to be my favourite, and all this time i thought i posted it here long ago, so i could find it easy when i want it. came back here and searched, but to no avail. so i tracked it down in the middle of one of my documents, to put it somewhere i can find it (yay blog search capability). don't think anybody knows for sure, but somerset maugham's been credited with this piece, appointment in samarra.
The speaker is death:
There was a merchant in Baghdad who sent his servant to market to buy provisions and in a little while the servant came back, white and trembling, and said, master, just now when I was in the marketplace I was jostled by a woman in the crowd and when I turned I saw it was death that jostled me. She looked at me and made a threatening gesture, now lend me your horse and I will ride away from this city and avoid my fate. I will go to Samarra and there death will not find me. The merchant lent him his horse, and the servant mounted it, and he dug his spurs in its flanks and as fast as the horse could gallop he went. Then the merchant went down to the marketplace and he saw me standing in the crowd and he came to me and said, why did you make a threatening gesture to my servant when you saw him this morning? That was not a threatening gesture, I said, it was only a start of surprise. I was astonished to see him in Baghdad, for I had an appointment with him tonight in Samarra.

walk good.

t'ief t'ing 2

i said the other day i would answer questions about you. protocol was stated.
"comment that you want in, and i will do each of the following:
1. respond with something random about you.
2. tell you which song or movie you remind me of.
3. pick a flavour of jello to wrestle you in.
4. say something that only makes sense to you+me (if possible; if not, something that only makes sense to me).
5. tell you my first memory of you.
6. tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. ask you something i've always wondered about you.
8. tell you my favourite thing about you.
9. tell you my least favourite thing about you."

in order of request. anonymous:
1. your dog was crazy.
2. eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.
3. cherry.
4. unravelling yet?
5. how the hell i suppose to work on this lame-ass computer?!
6. goat.
7. bic, electric, what? baby oil, cocoa butter, wax? method?
8. you crack my shit up and have pretty hands.
9. shall remain nameless.

crazyfool:
1. you've been tattooed while on display.
2. banana pancakes, jack johnson.
3. lemon.
4. you never as prepared as you think.
5. in the livingroom @ montello with the awful swank haircut+suit.
6. deer.
7. what you think you want to be when you grow up.
8. your talent and potential.
9. you're not as prepared as you think.

keifel:
1. your name gives absolutely no clue to your appearance.
2. breaking the rules for you because i'd be lying if i didn't say douglas adams' work, more than any song or film, including the hitchhikers guide film.
3. you making me break rules again, i actually have to go with chocolate pudding.
4. you're my favourite m+m.
5. during orange sky (jointpop? anchorage?) gig with lise, making sure we weren't related.
6. bear, as in hug.
7. how the hell you so well-adjusted...
8. your mind. and your books.
9. how little i see you. we can't lime no more...

walk good.

me eh forget yuh

the t'ief t'ing coming, as is carnival (post).
tonight's book launch was decent, except for an impromptu interview i was wholly unprepared for. didn't even occur to me, and they asked me not only to define noir as a genre (without being so versed as to mention genre) but then to explain my title woman is boss, which i couldn't find a way to do without giving away too much. of course, grims had the perfect tagline when i said as much in the car after. i should interview him to prep for being interviewed. i read better than @ uwi last week, though, more on par with the paper-based reading. i think being sick for uwi, the classroom vibe and unexpectedly having to "say something about the book" threw me.
i hate having to talk about myself or my work unscripted. ask me about something i get passionate about, not myself and what i do under cover of dark night. especially don't ask me to define whatever i've done. i even have to pretend i'm an actor reading some other author's script to read from my story.
well, at least my mother won't see tonight's footage and be mortified, because something inspired me to look nice tonight (for once, some might say) in skirt+heels and everything. i call it my "what not to wear" look...
walk good.

onobatopoeia

the bazooka's perfect for the joker because it manages to sound like a big gun and a toy gun at the same time.
walk good.

idiocracy

walk good.

t'ief t'ing

been wanting to try this for months since deidre did grims on facebook, and think my head might be clear enough to follow through now. so for all 3 readers of this blog (and i been so silent lately you prob'ly not even checking anymore) i ready to answer questions about you.
comment that you want in, and i will do each of the following:
1. respond with something random about you.
2. tell you which song or movie you remind me of.
3. pick a flavour of jello to wrestle you in.
4. say something that only makes sense to you+me (if possible; if not, something that only makes sense to me).
5. tell you my first memory of you.
6. tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. ask you something i've always wondered about you.
8. tell you my favourite thing about you.
9. tell you my least favourite thing about you.

walk good.

late

i only feel a little bad for now posting about christmas when carnival already jostling for space, because carnival and related projects hot on the heels of christmas were good enough reasons for my lapse. problem is, now i forget most of what i wanted to say, but can't move on until i blog it because i've had it tucked in a corner of my brain for so long that i have to do a christmas post.
nico and the gremlin were both home for for the holidays so even as a christmas-hater i had a decent time or 2. me+nico together in sweet trini again after only 1 too-brief-time in 10years was a joy- we real lime, he stayed by us about half the time, kept me company while grims got surgeried, kept me company into the wee hours when i couldn't sleep, was a hot date boxing night, hooked me up with a best black cake, was the best best friend ever. come back, nico! i missed you whole carnival! and you know you missed it, too.
i even managed to get out of going to the parents for major christmas drama- with grims recently surgeried and unable to go out, we got them to come to us, thus making the whole thing short+sweet. but i still need to figure out how to get back to our pyjama-christmas tradition without upsetting anybody. i can't take the damn christmas stress and don't have an excuse for this year.
plus by the time the gremlin flew out, she managed to move all her shit into my guestroom, talking 'bout, she staying by us for carnival (3 whole weeks, dread!) regardless of my informing her that's what her mudda house for and i had already seen her for christmas. and grims told her yes! you see the set up...she even leave shit in my damn fridge! fus she feel she living here.
although i suppose i can't complain, she wasn't bad, even did some dishes and shit while she was here, bringing boys over so i couldn't relax home in my panty. but more on carnival sooncome...in the meanwhile, christmas2009 excuses welcome in comments.
walk good.
ps: actually just realised that every time i plan to post about time with nico or the gremlin, it ends up at least a month late. so i'ma blame them.