ting to come back to

awhile now i eh do this and i re/learn my damn lesson the hard way when i accidentally delete the file i was keeping all the shit i intended to blog. so lemme not stick on these3 i wanna be able to tackback to.

this for a few reasons. [and i so glad my music theory understanding enough that i could follow the whole ting because] i love this song deeply, regardless of how much its popularity make it overplayed i always thrill to hear it, love how it so layered+complex and manage to have this seemingly light melody but feel melancholy-to-dark in that way i like, so much so i always assume without ever checking is a minor key because is make me feel that certain kinna way certain songs do that i never understand and then i find out they minor [stevie's do me this, and, of course, shadow] and this video's get into the elements i think make alla-that so, because i always find it interesting that it often used to signify frivolity and that people find it kitsch when i find the tune anything but, which also make me realise my primary experience of the song affected by the fact that is the darker-feeling d-flat version with blues-countermelody discussed here i meet 1st and love best and thus play+hear most, so much so even though i never know or even try to analyse before what the difference is i know some other times i hear it out i's be slight disappointed, not loving the song less but some of them other versions send me straight back to listen to the one(s) i have instead for satisfaction, because i like weird and how lovely to learn it have weird shit about a song i already love, because, orfeu negro references.

this because even though i know from before why we dislike the sound of our own voice i think it explain my lifelong struggle with being told i talking loud in moments when i feel like my level being dictated by not being able to hear meself over whaever other sound(s) currently present (that seem to make no difference to others in the space) especially when the other sound(s) musical. i always been sound-sensitive plus struggle to hear human voice, hadda listen real intently when people talking to me but simultaneously catch the faintest bassline on the breeze from many plenty blocks away and can tell you wha' tune playing and be able to make out even at distance where the mix going and feel like i hearing that clearer than whoever talking to me right in my face. and my ears tune into my own speaking voice least of all (voices inside my head always make themselves perfectly heard, though); wha' she say 'bout mechanical filter@9minutes, followed by the biological+neurological filters sound exactly like that struggle to hear myself speak feel; come like my filters wukkin too good for my own good. a revelation.

and this because rule of 3 plus i find it so good at wha' it actually purport to be and intriguing in a kinna-feel-to-do-this way...

walk good.