pole envy

[finally posted monday december12.2011]

i have a confession (and no, is not the backshots, get yuh mind out the gutta).

actually, no, i apologise, sans parentheses, 'cause that inside joke aside was so inside it was completely self-indulgent; entirely script-based.

apologies aside: i have pole envy.

this show was cast smart and i weirdly enjoy "aunty sam"s weirdness but lately, after playing on the pole to build choreography and realising how easy it come for me and what i capable of, now i wish i were cast as 1 of the 3girls who work gutta beautiful's public pussy project 'cause i should be on that pole. i wanna show off my skills that nobody will get to appreciate...sigh...so jealous...oh, speaking of which: dear universe, for christmas what i really want is u$600 to buy a freestanding portable pole...

*needle scratch on vinyl*this post interrupted- yesterday i pause writing to go do production stuff and tech; post-rehearsal, everyting change.

gutta's director threw a hissy fit and quit tonight. our last run was monday in the rehearsal space, we never run in the theatre yet, jes' basic tech; we have opening night audience friday. we have no director.

radio silence.

i readily admit i cyah write someting while it happening. only when a situation over/resolved can i speak on it, to it, about it, of it. so i started this post, came back to say the world was falling apart, and never came back since because it only now done. the las' time i was here it we didn' know if it still could, but gutta happened. it was a good show. we had a director but much more stress+difficulty than those words suggest. general feedback: acting was very good/strong/of a high calibre, the production was too long but looked good, choreography was good and sox rock the pole, not everybody understood all layers of the piece, certain directorial choices were questioned. i was happy with my work as choreographer+actor, and was complimented on delivery, clarity and intention.

jes needed to get the basics off my chest so i can create again (gyazette musical to write, 3canal carnival show to plot plus warrenman inveigling me to choreograph for it...)- full gutta story sooncome...walk good.

we have a show

it happening.

fragments, pieces, motivations, inspirations coming together.

we seeing hearing feeling this gutta beautiful we in, creating it as we living it, our lives and our characters', scary and enervating and exhausting and glad. so much work being done, so much wuk to do...props creeping in, costumes in varying stages of assembly, posters+ads getting make, pole reach in rehearsal space, soundtrack almost completely in place, choreography getting nailed down and cleaned up, unnecessaries getting trimmed...we have a show, now is to tighten and sharpen, now is about moving the journey along.

walk good.

ps: randomly read+enjoyed and determined shareworthy after a simple edit: "i love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing, and only a smidgen of the guilt."

and we say we want drama?

well, we get.
we cyah say griot's gutta beautiful doh have drama.
first+foremost, we have no $. we sooo have no $ that we eh pay for nutting yet but still tens of thousands overbudget because we so doh have $ that (inevitable) basic production costs are pure debt. we so have no $ that even though the first $ we get wasn't even enough to pay a production-team-member or bring a single production element to stage-execution, a happy dance was in order.
then photographer ring night before las' week's scheduled photoshoot to say, death in the family, he cyah shoot us wednesday. he cyah do nutting for a whole week so we reschedule for the following wednesday (this week) which mean we behind with creating tickets and promotional material, plus now i missing because this week i in coco dance festival and tech+dress monday-wednesday and perform thursday-sunday, thus can only make griot for the 1st half of sunday's rehearsal before coco calltime.
then costume designer say, las' minute without enough pre-photoshoot notice, she cyah make at all, and following that news, photographer ringback+say he still dealing with family stuff and cyah shoot this week neither.
i might not be in the gutta with griot right now but still hadda be about griot+gutta: scrambling to think of a way to make it work without pre-production photoshoot (to no avail) then finding another photographer las' minute, figuring out how to source+afford costumes for photos+run, debating whether we can afford both scheduled performance weekends and a character we thought we were cutting from the piece, managing other little behind-the-scenes drama to maximise productivity, learning lines+accent backstage@coco; plus we behind rehearsal schedule because of everybody's conflicts- besides me in coco this week+rehearsals-past, we have/had sox juggling next top model and anime caribe, disa+nickolai's gyazette rehearsals+gigs, abeo's other gigs, marvin juggling school+job, and camille+danielle with school and random tings...making theatre is truly a wuk of love, yes, 'cause it facking hard and the $ sooo not worth it...
at least no-curfew is a few more hours/day to make/art/wuk...not staying productive provokes existential crisis, constant awareness of being less than human without rights makes the state of emergency life threatening...

walk good.

emergency stashes; a mishmash

• in my teens, dancing 5-7days a week, it was a squeeze bottle of chocolate syrup in the dance bag that i never made chocolate milk with; i keep tea in my smoke box for as long as i've had one, and sometimes dry milo. i seem to have settled on tea, catch(dark) and (patsy's split)channa as constants, with a rotating cast of tunnocks, jubjubs, red mango and roughtops, and tamarind balls when i lucky, for the munchies.
• i met a stripper ('missy' from new zealand) who performed with a little velvety green+gold-trimmed bailey's cloth baggie tied to her garter to keep tips. i told her i had a similar soft purple+gold-trimmed crown royal bag i'd bring her from when we used to do shots in the dressingroom before every hedwig show; she was thrilled. i got home and realised (duh, had i thought of the bottle that came in it insteada studying cloth sliding up missy's thigh) my bag was way too big for the same purpose as her bailey's number, but never saw her @ the palace again anyway. now i keep sextoys in it, in her honour.
• boys are gross and hilarious. a friend tell me how back in the day when one of his pardners bep in a lime, them boys would crack open a raw egg over his bumseecrack and leave it drying sticky for him to wake+find and think somebody violate his arse while he sleep. a few days later i telling another pardner how appalled i am and he bawl, "like them eh know yuh suppose to sprinkle a little peppersauce too, for the burn and to look like blood? steups!"
• and as we hit a theatrical note, please help save our naparima bowl (online petition)- we cyah afford to give up what few performance spaces we have...

walk good.

public pussy project

tonight we started wukkin the gutta [beautiful] girls' public pussy project choreography; thus far i been wukkin movement for transitions and group scenes, tonight was the 1st time we get down+dirty. and it was goood...
carpetburn, bruised knees, skinned shoulders+elbows, stretched groins, and a rehearsal video to prove it! (doh mind the chaotic opening moments, i was djing and still critiquing+choreographing in my head while tryna get me+phone in position, but i reach before disa, sox+abeo start, so enjoy...above is me+danielle, non-public-pussy-movement...)

walk good.