Monday, August 09, 2010

finally, fff#25!

officially the longest i ever take to fff, and truthfully, my sense of competition prompted, somewhat, when i saw somebody else finally wrote this one; not to be outdone...but i also wanted to do right, cause i figure if somebody new wash foot + jump in, the least i could do is have a new fff ready for them friday coming, and i always like to finish the previous one before triggering next, so i pushed myself.
for a variety of reasons,the last becoming apparent to me literally while finishing this draft, this one's a big experiment with voice; wanted to see if i could make a major adjustment over the course of a relatively short piece, for reasons to do with the movement of the piece, and make it not jar, so lewwe see...

the double ten recede further into past tense, rainy-day details now. forward into consciousness from the soup of memory you pace, first only in one direction belying divided intentions, until, enough distance gained, you transition to the recognisable back+forth of a restless mind seeking quiet.

think with your own mind, not the one they lend back to you, stripped of its natural imaginatory resources. pull reason from further back than the double ten, before you accepted the mining of minds as a screensaver for the insidious percolating in the background.

those who mind don’t matter; those who matter don’t mind.

think in your own language, in your natural voice, ‘cause you know the old woman right. you know she right since them words fire from the red-lipstick-cannon of she wrinkled old mouth, cyah stop ricochet between your ears, you cyah squash them like how you do yourself in this place trying to fit in with people who doh know about anything that make you you.

“them that mind doh matter; them that matter doh mind…”

you know she right but the double ten is how you reach this far, the double ten show you how to talk and move and act like somebody who doh get ask no question in this place, somebody who could disappear into the background…ent tha’s wha you want?

you finally face the question you using the double ten to hide from all this time. you watch yourself in your mind and you know the truth and the words stop jockeying inside your head. you coming home to yourself.

you give up the mask to play a mas, to play yuhself.

walk good.


Post a Comment

<< Home