Tuesday, June 20, 2006


and i have no words.
so i'm not trying.

emailing today, i had cause to mention that i'm not a good person, and it reminded me of something. tell me if you think this was bad- grims was giving me talk for it a coupla nights ago:
i had a 2-show-day saturday, and grims+jeff went by jp (i know 3 personally and know of a 4th, locally) so they left and picked me up and brought me back to jp's after my 2nd performance. they'd met jp's work peoples earlier, and i'm not good @ meeting people unless i've had time to observe and decide i want to meet them. plus, it was post-show, which means post-me+jay's-get-through-act2-scene2-joint (we're done early and have to wait through the other characters' lengthy dramatic climax to bow) so it's now 11pm, i'm comfy in my red cloth+darkers, high, and somewhat tired+hungry, and thus, brooking no shit.
so shortly, 2 of the chickies are leaving (thankfully, the 2 i'd found less-than-intriguing) and the others (who were cool) start saying shit along the lines of, "show us before you leave..."
now, apart from it being obvious, i didn't care, so i didn't ask, but the blonde giggly one they were talking to turns to me and says, "i got a tattoo earlier today..."
so i say, "oh."
and go back to making my 4-finger-fortune-teller. like i said, i didn't care. i have 5, and knew without checking that hers (from jinxproof, whose work i despise) couldn't compare to the art cheewah designed for me.
but they keep begging, and she finally raises her shirt and flashes it, retardedly placed on her torso. they miss it amid the clamourous din, so i interject and inform them that they're missing the spectacle. she refuses to flash it again, and i, finding her stupid, ask, "why did you get it if you didn't want anybody to see it?"
she mumbles something about it being for herself, so i kindly point out, "but you can't see it."
now, i thought she asked for that and got nothing but what was fair, but grims said i called her out. and it occurred to me that that's what i mean.
i often say i'm not a good person, and friends say "why?", and i can never quite explain. but this is it: i'm not a bitch, but i don't give a shit and prefer for stupid people to know i think that of them, so they don't come around me again.

this often makes me not a good person. but i don't feel bad about it.
walk good.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you are just fine the way you are.


11:00 am  

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